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gilinternship

Learning to Listen at the Orange County Rape Crisis Center - with Bella Grumet

Updated: 5 days ago


My whole life I have been praised for being the first to volunteer, contribute to a discussion, or take the lead in a group project. But, when I reflect on the most meaningful experiences in my life, it's not the times people spoke, but instead when they listened.

 

Very few people’s first reaction to hearing they need brain surgery is a positive one. I, on the other hand, was elated. Four doctors, an eye exam, a cardiovascular stress test, and a neurology appointment had determined my headaches were a normal part of puberty. The treatment included a new diet and several talks about how my body was going through changes.  Not only is having “that talk” every 6th grader’s worst nightmare, it also left me without answers. I spent the majority of 6th grade lying motionless in a dark room, afraid to worsen the ever-present headache that had taken me from a martial artist, soccer player, and singer to a kid who couldn’t make it through a day of school without 6 Advil. Thanks to modern medicine and a mom who never gave up, an MRI revealed that I had been born with a Chiari Malformation. Someone finally listened to me, and someone could fix it.

 

Unfortunately, not all problems in life can be solved by some extra brain tissue popping up on an MRI.


There have been times when I wished the thoughts racing through my head could appear on a scan and be used as proof. Times when it felt like the only thing I had in my corner was my word. Times when her word against his never stood a chance. 


The Orange County Rape Crisis Center (OCRCC) puts a team of dedicated advocates in your corner. The OCRCC is a nonprofit committed to stopping sexual violence and its impact through support, advocacy, and education. In my sophomore year, I began working at the OCRCC as a crisis hotline volunteer, and supporting people in those critical moments has been one of the most fulfilling experiences of my life. I committed to deepening my involvement after attending the OCRCC's annual gala and witnessing its profound community impact. Thanks to the Karen M. Gil Internship Program, I now have the privilege of working with the OCRCC’s Executive Director, Rachel Valentine, and Client Services Director, Ray Wasilewski, on programming and client services.


Under their mentorship, I’m leading a research project to assess survivor access to resources on college campuses. The goal is to identify strengths and areas for improvement and to build a partnership between campus resources and the OCRCC. Through this project, I have learned not only how to advocate for clients but for myself. Passing a proposal through the Institutional Review Board and problem-solving roadblocks in participant recruitment have built my resilience and newfound respect for the research process. 


In another project, I’m collaborating with fellow interns to create a deck of cards featuring somatic and mindfulness exercises for clients. I’m currently researching Polyvagal Theory, which explores how the autonomic nervous system shapes our emotions, behaviors, and stress responses. This theory outlines a hierarchy of states: Ventral Vagal (social engagement and regulation), Sympathetic (fight or flight), and Dorsal Vagal (freeze or shutdown). This resource will create a better understanding of the stress response to support clients in and out of the office.


While these projects are extremely important to me, the most meaningful part of my work at the center is meeting one-on-one with clients. Sitting down with survivors, hearing their stories, and connecting them to resources inspires me to continue my work with the OCRCC. I hope to contribute to clients feeling seen, heard, and empowered to take their next steps. 


I’m grateful for the mentorship and professional growth I’ve received from Rachel and Ray, as well as from Gil Coordinators: Dr. Steven Buzinski and Emily Dolegowski. I am extremely grateful to have had the opportunity to combine my fascination with neuroscience and my passion for advocacy. Moving forward, I plan to integrate the OCRCC’s empowerment model into my current role as a pediatric nursing assistant and future clinical work. At the OCRCC, I've learned that sometimes the greatest impact comes from active listening and trust-building. These lessons in listening will guide me not only as a future physician but in every role I take on.


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